I should be an advice columnist

I really should be.  I think I give great advice despite the fact that no one follows my advice.  Over the years I appear to have developed a reputation as someone that people feel they can talk to.  I can honestly say that this was NOT something I cultivated..AT ALL and there were times when I wished people didn't seek me out to get advice from me.

This became very apparent to me at my last job.  Our HR manager (former one especially) was hated by the employees...and I mean HATED by the employees.  Because I was out on the floor so much with my job responsibilities and the employees knew that I worked closely with that department, people tended to confide in me, just about everything.  There was truly very little that I didn't know about almost all the employees there.  Personally and professionally.  I knew everyone's secrets and it was empowering (in a "I can blackmail you" kind of way) and humbling in the fact that they trusted me to not only help them but in most instances, keep their confidences too.  If I needed to involve someone else, like an outside agency, then I always told them that I was going to do that before I did it.

But I digress...I really don't like to give advice.  But I know that my advice is respectful, insightful and does not fail to call people on their bullshit.  I'm also very good at seeing both points of view and of seeing just how others see you as you describe a situation.  Most importantly, I know what I don't know.  If I cannot give you good advice on an issue, my advice will sound something like this "I don't know enough about that to give you good advice, perhaps someone who knows more about that issue would be better suited to advice you" OR "I just don't know".

Over the years I have given tons of advice (I would like to say that all the advice I give is ASKED for, it is unusual for me to give unsolicited advice unless I feel compelled to speak) to people.  The minute someone turns to me and asks "What do you think?" it's on like a house on fire.  But then they nod their heads in agreement and then do the exact OPPOSITE! I get the whole free will thing, certainly you are free to do as you please but don't ask for advice if you aren't even bothering to consider it! Nothing is more frustrating than to give advice, explain how the situation will play out should they fail to heed your advice and then stand back and watch what happens.  I'm not one to say "I told you so..." but I will remind you of a previous conversation we had where we discussed the possible outcomes should you X or if you did X.  If you ask me for advice and I give it, you can bet that it is solid advice and you would do well to heed my advice.

But if you choose not to take my advice, you should know I'm still here.  Bad choices not withstanding, I'm still a good friend (and this time you had better take my advice!!)